Do You Want to Be a Winner?

All true winners in life have certain characteristics. Ifonly things you are proud of. That maintains your
you want to be a winner, you have to develop theintegrity.
same characteristics. These characteristics are theMaintaining your integrity:
keys to ultimate happiness and success. Here are theIntegrity means doing things that are ethical, doing the
two most important keys.right thing. First and foremost, keep your word. How
I've been writing about how important it is to have high,much do you admire a person whose word you can
unconditional self regard. Every winner in life has hightrust? Live in such a manner that people can say of
self-esteem. High unconditional self regard creates highyou, "Her word is her bond."
self-esteem.You do not go around making promises to people just
In the 1950's unconditional self regard was all the ragebecause you think that is what they want to hear, and
in the mental health field. Carl Rogers became famousthen not following through with it. If you are giving a
for his form of therapy. The therapist treated a patientparty, you want a person to mean it if they say they
with unconditional high regard, hoping that the personare going to come, you do not want them saying that
would take on this attitude towards himself, and inthey are coming, expect them, and then be
most cases it worked.disappointed.
You can give yourself unconditional high regard, acceptIf you do this to people, they are going to catch on and
yourself no matter what. Understand that you arestart losing their faith and trust in you. They may say
doing the best that you can. Be gracious; understandsomething like, "He seems like a pleasant fellow, but
that others are doing the best that they can. This is ayou know you can't really count on him." When it
simple yet extremely effective formula for havingcomes to doing business, they'll find somebody else.
successful relationships with people.It's obvious, if you don't keep your word in business
Now some of you might think, "This is the ticket, I justdealings, people won't trust you and keep doing
get to accept everything I do, good and bad, and I getbusiness with you. You may trick somebody into a
a free ride. I can do anything and it is okay."one-time sale, but you will not get repeat business -
Ah, but that is not the way it works. In order to haveand repeat business is the most lucrative business -
true happiness, you have to have true self-esteem;and you can imagine what kind of word-of-mouth you
you have to have true unconditional high self regard,get. Without integrity, your business and your life will be
which means you must do only things that you areone long struggle.
proud of. How can you regard yourself highly if youYou will wind up not only feeling bad about having a
are ashamed of yourself? You cannot go aroundpoor business; what is worse, you will feel bad about
doing things that you are ashamed of. It does notyourself.
work, if you truly want to be a winner. This is theDo you want to be a winner?
second secret - living with integrity.Then remember the second secret of being a winner
The first secret, which I have discussed in earlieris to be a person of high integrity.
writings, is giving yourself unconditional high self regard,Only do things which you can be proud of.
accepting and loving yourself. The second secret is doKeep your word.